Why is the Patient the One Running the Group Chat?

Your therapist, primary care provider, specialist, and other healthcare providers all have a piece of the puzzle. So why are you the one trying to connect all the dots?

Welcome to the healthcare group chat!

When it comes to your mental and physical health, there are a lot of moving parts that should be part of one connected conversation.

Let’s introduce the members of the chat: your primary care provider, healthcare specialists, therapist, psychiatrist, physical therapist, dietitian, and many others. Every single one of them has a specialty.

You see them for specific reasons to address different aspects of your overall well-being. The challenge is that even though these pieces are deeply interconnected, your providers don’t always align or communicate with one another.

Instead, you end up playing telephone between offices. It is incredibly common to find yourself scheduling multiple appointments just because one provider said this, the next said that, someone else changed a medication, and another is questioning your overall treatment plan entirely. You might find yourself sitting in your car in the clinic parking lot, completely overwhelmed and in tears because you just received conflicting medical advice from two different specialists and have no idea who to believe. Not only are you trying to make it through your day-to-day life while managing complex health symptoms, but you are also spending your lunch breaks on hold with medical offices and insurance companies, trying to ensure everyone has the right information.

It is exhausting. It places an overwhelming sense of responsibility on you to communicate complex clinical details that are outside your area of expertise. You are already doing your best to manage your physical and mental health; you shouldn't also have to act as the unpaid administrative assistant in a very inefficient system. Because your mind and body are deeply connected, you need your providers on the same page to make real progress without the constant back-and-forth.

Here is what we do know: your brain and your body are already communicating with one another.

That is one group chat you don’t have to micromanage. Your physical and mental health are not two separate systems. If you are navigating chronic health conditions, multiple diagnoses, stress, or sleep issues, it will impact both your body and your mind. This is why, as a Kansas City therapist, when I meet with clients, I check on various aspects of their daily functioning. They all influence one another.

This is also why diagnostic criteria can feel so overwhelming. In the mental health space, we frequently see how anxiety, depression, grief, trauma, and chronic stress manifest physically. This doesn’t mean your symptoms are "all in your head." It simply means your mental and physical health are constantly interacting. This interaction often breeds medical anxiety, a very real, exhausting cycle where physical symptoms trigger intense worry, and that worry, in turn, worsens your physical symptoms. Trying to navigate scary symptoms while researching diagnoses and preparing for doctor's appointments can make your nervous system feel constantly under siege. That is why utilizing a therapy provider who is comfortable working within a multidisciplinary team is so valuable. As a health psychologist, I recognize how these systems interact and can help you translate what each provider is seeing into a cohesive, grounded plan of action.

You might be wondering: who are you, and how do you know all this to be true? My name is Dr. Erica Magsam, and I am trained as a health psychologist. What does that mean? I have extensive experience working both inside and outside of traditional medical settings alongside the very providers you see. Health psychologists specialize in understanding the intersection of physical health, mental health, behavior, and how people function within complex healthcare systems. Healthcare systems are incredibly complicated. It should not be your job to figure out who needs to know what. That is a task a member of your treatment team should handle for you.

A health psychologist understands how physical sensations, medications, and the mental load of illness impact your overall quality of life. We help individuals manage a variety of challenges, including medical anxiety and health-related worries, adjusting to acute or chronic changes in physical functioning, navigating chronic illness, chronic pain, or new diagnoses, processing difficult or traumatic medical experiences, and learning how to advocate for yourself and communicate your needs to your medical team. By having a therapist who understands healthcare systems and is comfortable collaborating with multidisciplinary teams, you get a provider who can communicate directly with your medical team. You no longer have to be the middleman. We can treat you as a whole person, helping you get better, more coordinated care.

So, let’s go back to that group chat.

What if your therapist and your doctors actually talked to one another? Direct communication between providers leads to better, more coordinated care. With your consent, relevant information can be shared behind the scenes so you don’t have to spend your already too-short doctor’s appointments playing catch-up.

We can discuss exactly what information is helpful to share. This might look like a brief, secure ten-minute phone call between me and your primary care doctor to coordinate on how a new medication is affecting your sleep, or sharing a quick, focused update with your physical therapist. Your therapist can also help you digest clinical details that might have felt too overwhelming to process during a doctor's visit. For example, when you receive a new diagnosis or hear you need a complex medical procedure, your brain and body often go into a protective shock response, causing you to miss key details. As a health psychologist, I can help you process that information, prepare your questions, and advocate for your needs.

Of course, your privacy and consent is at the highest importance. Working with a multidisciplinary team does not mean every provider gets access to everything you discuss in therapy. We establish clear boundaries and utilize specific releases of information. Any communication that happens is intentional, appropriate, and entirely authorized by you.

The goal is simple: to care for you as a whole person, rather than breaking you into separate pieces based on which specialist you are seeing that day.

I love working with different areas of the healthcare system because every provider brings a unique perspective on how to help you feel more like yourself. You are already doing the heavy lifting of managing your symptoms every day. You shouldn't have to carry the burden of coordinating your own medical care, too. Integrated care matters, especially when you are dealing with chronic illness, medical anxiety, or complex diagnoses that are simply too much for one person to carry alone.

I am passionate about serving as an active part of my clients' multidisciplinary teams, which is why I discuss this collaborative approach at the very beginning of my work with new clients. It is also why I love supporting other healthcare providers as clients in my practice as a Kansas City therapist.

Healthcare professionals often carry the heaviest mental load of all, trying to navigate their own care while managing the demands of the system. They often make the most exhausted patients because they feel immense pressure to navigate their own treatment perfectly. If you are ready to hand over the coordinator role, take off the provider hat, and focus on your healing, let's connect. Reach out today to learn how we can bring your care team together and get you the comprehensive support you deserve.

Resources

Therapy with Me (A Kansas City Therapist Ready to Support You)

If you are someone who constantly feels overwhelmed by the mental load of managing your own health, struggles with the exhausting cycle of medical anxiety, or finds yourself trapped in the role of playing telephone between your doctors, you do not have to navigate this alone.

As a licensed therapist in Kansas City, Missouri, I specialize in helping people navigate the complex intersection of physical and mental health. I work with individuals who feel the heavy pressure of managing chronic illness, navigating new diagnoses, or carrying the stress of a healthcare system that feels incredibly broken. Together, we will work on quietening the voice of medical anxiety, learning how to advocate for your needs, and coordinating your care so you can finally step out of the "coordinator" role and focus on your healing.

If you are ready to stop being the middleman in your own healthcare and start receiving comprehensive, integrated support, head over to my website at lifeyourway.org and send me a message to get connected for individual therapy support.

(Please note: I am located in Kansas City, MO, and provide therapy services to clients located in Missouri).

Apps:

• How We Feel: This is an amazing, free app that helps you put actual words to what you are feeling physically and emotionally. When you are dealing with medical anxiety, it can be hard to untangle physical symptoms from emotional stress. This app helps you track and pinpoint exactly what is going on inside your body and mind so you can share accurate information with your care team.

• Insight Timer: If you need to quiet the noise of medical stress and calm an overactive nervous system, this is my favorite app for free guided meditations. They have thousands of quick, realistic tracks specifically designed for calming anxiety, managing chronic pain, improving sleep, and practicing self-compassion when your body feels like it is letting you down.

  
  

Books:

• How to Be Sick by Toni Bernhard: This is a compassionate, deeply practical guide on how to navigate the emotional and mental toll of chronic illness and unexpected shifts in physical functioning. It offers invaluable tools for finding peace and stability when your physical health feels unpredictable.

• The Chronic Illness Workbook by Patricia Fennell: This is an incredibly practical, hands-on guide that helps you understand the different stages of adjusting to a health condition. It provides clear worksheets and tools to help you reclaim your life, manage your energy, and navigate the emotional ups and downs of living with chronic symptoms.

  
  

Coping Skills:

• The "Body Scan" Grounding Practice: When medical anxiety strikes or physical symptoms start to feel overwhelming, your nervous system can easily go into a fight-or-flight response. Take three slow, deep breaths. Slowly scan your body from your toes to your head, simply noticing physical sensations without judging them or trying to fix them. Acknowledge the sensation, tell yourself, "My body is trying to keep me safe right now," and focus on slowly lengthening your exhales to signal to your brain that you are secure in this moment.

• The Appointment Prep List: To reduce the mental load of playing telephone between your providers, keep a running note on your phone dedicated to your healthcare. Whenever a symptom pops up, a medication side effect occurs, or a question crosses your mind, write it down immediately. Before your next appointment, select the top three most important questions to address. This keeps you focused, reduces the anxiety of trying to remember everything in a short visit, and gives you a clear script to share with your medical team.